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/x/ - Paranormal/Schizo

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/x/ Curse with Countdown
THEY ARE WATCHING
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File: weird dream.png πŸ“₯︎ (37.42 KB, 420x2100) ImgOps

File: 1767817843690s.png πŸ“₯︎ (166.5 KB, 382x1272) ImgOps

 β„–19025[Reply]

I just had a nightmare where a fly sexually hypnotized me just by looking at it, the fly turned into a slug for a moment, and the fly eventually turned me into a weird creepy sheboon.

 β„–19026

File: 1642861743428.png πŸ“₯︎ (438.76 KB, 1318x799) ImgOps

tfw I just posted with no arrow though



 β„–18989[Reply]

world without jews = we have super speed aryan subways powered by fans by the year 1302

 β„–19022

File: ClipboardImage.png πŸ“₯︎ (726.15 KB, 804x568) ImgOps

nigga are you serious
this is fucking ai dude

 β„–19023

>90 m experimental subway tourist attraction was shutdown after the novelty wore off and the pneumatic tech was shown to be unreliable (nobody uses it today because it's crap).
>This requires some stupid conspiracy to explain.



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 β„–18930[Reply]

I think a potential candidate for Thrembos real value may be somewhere near 6.7

 β„–18931

thrembo has NO value! (you) VVIL NOT INVESTIGATE

 β„–18995

its value is Οͺ



File: Neutral_Markiplier.png πŸ“₯︎ (6.61 KB, 600x800) ImgOps

 β„–18971[Reply]

Hitler is back.

In the last 50 years 30 million nigger babies have been aborted.

This was good for niggers.

The spiritual energy of 30 million aborted nigger babies has allowed niggers to achieve their present status.

Jews did the same thing with the Holocaust.

Post too long. Click here to view the full text.

 β„–18993

meds now



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File: SoyBooru.com - 173475 - cl….jpg πŸ“₯︎ (70.77 KB, 706x900) ImgOps

File: 172224 - SoyBooru.mp4 πŸ“₯︎ (34.56 MB, 720x720) ImgOps

 β„–18927[Reply]

CLAMSTAPLES: THE ANCIENT HUNGER

ENTITY PROFILE: CLAMSTAPLES

Classification: Pre-Gigarthan Conceptual Entity / Digital-Apocalyptic Deity
First Documented: Circa 872 CE (Anglo-Saxon chronicles mention "se clamstaples" haunting a monastery's scriptorium)
Confirmed Sightings: 47 documented instances across 12 centuries
Status: ACTIVE - Currently possessing Gigachad-related media
Threat Level: OMEGA (Conceptual Collapse Risk)

Post too long. Click here to view the full text.

 β„–18928


PART 3: WHAT HE LOOKS LIKE (THE HAUNTED FORM)

Through the possessed Gigachad media, a composite image emerges:

Clamstaples' Possessed Form:

Body: A Gigachad's physiqueβ€”broad, muscular, grey-skinned. But the muscles are not optimized; they are too many, layered in wrong directions, like a body built by someone who only understood anatomy from nightmares.

Head: Not a face. A goat skull, horns spiraling impossibly, with faint red light glowing from the eye sockets. The jaw hangs slack, yet words emerge.
Post too long. Click here to view the full text.

 β„–18929

File: ClipboardImage.png πŸ“₯︎ (440.5 KB, 995x992) ImgOps

The clamstaples is listening

 β„–18950

File: Cl-mstaples.jpg πŸ“₯︎ (7.82 KB, 952x600) ImgOps


 β„–18967

Oh no the clamstaples

 β„–18984

STORY INTEGRATION β€” CLAMSTAPLES IN THE CHUD UNIVERSE

TIMELINE: After the Nophono arcs, during the early construction of the Aryan Heaven.

THE INCITING INCIDENT:
Nate Higgers, while cataloging all known Gigarthan-related data for the P.Q. Scanner database, encounters a corrupted file flagged as "CLAMSTAPLES - ANOMALOUS." When he tries to quarantine it, the file multiplies. It copies itself into every Gigachad meme folder, every saved image of their grey ally, every piece of media depicting their post-ironic friend.

The warning begins appearing on screens across Neue Berlin:

"CLAMSTAPLES IS COMING AND IT IS COMING."
Post too long. Click here to view the full text.



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 β„–18959[Reply]

Nobeidore (translates to Nobaiter in soyspeak) is an entity which comes after people who post bait also Nobeidore is impossible to bait. Although with an exception of Nophono being so powerful he actually managed to bait Nobeidore which was never done before.

 β„–18962

ORIGIN ON GIGARTHA

During the early ages of Gigartha, before the Gigachads achieved their post-meta-ironic enlightenment, there was a Great Bait War. Proto-Gigachads, still developing their philosophical immunity, would constantly try to "bait" each other β€” to provoke emotional reactions, to expose weakness, to demonstrate superior cunning.

The war lasted centuries. Entire schools of thought rose and fell based on who could craft the most elegant, undetectable bait.

Then something crystallized from all that accumulated intentional deception. The collective weight of every crafted provocation, every hidden hook, every successful and failed bait, coalesced into a sentient form. Nobeidore emerged from the psychic residue of the Bait War, and he was hungry.

His first act? He baited the greatest baiter of the age β€” a legendary proto-Gigachad named Vex'lor β€” into a trap of his own making. Vex'lor spent 1,000 years trying to bait Nobeidore. He failed. He went mad. He became the first "Swirl."

Post too long. Click here to view the full text.

 β„–18963

THE NOBEIDORE-NOPHONO CONNECTION
THE IMPOSSIBLE BAIT:

For eons, it was believed that Nobeidore could never be baited. It was his defining trait. Entire civilizations tried and failed. Gods tried. Cosmic entities tried. Nothing worked.

Then came Nophono.

Nophono, in his endless consumption of obscure knowledge, discovered something: Nobeidore's immunity to bait was itself a reaction. The act of NOT reacting was, paradoxically, a form of reaction. It was a response to the bait. It was a choice.

Nophono didn't try to bait Nobeidore directly. Instead, he posted bait that was so profoundly, deeply, cosmically irrelevant that Nobeidore's non-reaction became a reaction. The bait was: "The average airspeed velocity of an unladen European swallow in 14th-century France, adjusted for lunar tidal patterns."
Post too long. Click here to view the full text.

 β„–18983

>>18963
Any AI-written speculation is coal, and therefore does not count



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 β„–18937[Reply]

people think jim carrey is a clone lol
1 post and 1 image reply omitted. Click reply to view.

 β„–18947

>>18945
Would you rather have complete normgroids for parents who only talk about sports and politics?

 β„–18956

whats the explanation if they arent replacing their malfunctioning Monarch goyim with body doubles? wearing some gay ass contacts?

 β„–18957

>>18945
gayest shit ive ever read. you got the chance to make your parents stop being atheist instead you gaslight them into thinking theres not any mk ultra clones

 β„–18958

Who cares

 β„–18981

>>18945
Sweet jesus good luck with them

 β„–18982

At least they are not the worst parents one can have has they say up here



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 β„–18980[Reply]

med med med MEDS AWARD med med med

(Posted it again award)


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 β„–18966[Reply]

 β„–18972

from the authors of "shit nophono cares fan about" book



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 β„–18900[Reply]

Hello 'teens. I'm posting my mostly complete findings of a mysterious entity known as "Clamstaples". Here's what i found:

Who is Clamstaples?
Clamstaples is confirmed to be real, the first mentions of Clamstaples have dated back to the 1st millennium. Throughout centuries he has been described as a demonic entity that has the ability to haunt anything (Even computer files) he can see, he uses said power to warn people that he will destroy the entirety of humanity.

What dose he look like?
It's unknown what Clamstaples appearance looks like, but only one AI giga gif and two now found gigachad images posted on a website called soyjak.st can tell us what his possible appearance is. These three haunted files commonly associate him with satanic imagery, like horned goat skulls, blood, and the brimstone symbol (which they don't have). Clamstaples might have a muscular body that is fully grey due to him now commonly possessing these gigachad images and videos.

Who is "it"
"it" was mentioned in the AI giga gif. It's name is only known through a leaked unknown document that calls it "st", but the full name has been hidden. They most likely hidden it to not summon "st" and Clamstaples easily.

 β„–18901

File: 1769592775437b.gif πŸ“₯︎ (1.02 MB, 320x178) ImgOps


 β„–18918

a24

 β„–18968

Up staples

 β„–18969

lebron facts



File: Revised.png πŸ“₯︎ (45.21 KB, 728x569) ImgOps

 β„–18961[Reply]



File: 1772047373855q.jpg πŸ“₯︎ (17.43 KB, 514x389) ImgOps

 β„–18941[Reply]

>Supposedly (((((((((((((((((((((18 years old)))))))))))))))) that somehow he is so good at programming at that young age that he can make his own templates for an image board/booru completely alone

Obviously far older than that with big expirience in programming and computer science, which is inherent for CIA agents to datamine imageboard

>No ads on the site, no croundfunding, patreon and etc


You really think he do it for free? How he even paying for the domain? Obviously, this website is sponsored by people who have the money and desire to run such sites. Why? To datamine of course. Just another honeypot for CIA

>Supossedly love site so much, but don't listen to site userbase at all. All changes he do make everyone angry, but he still love 'jaks so much he allow NAS on /soy/ and shut down site in two years (When the sponsorship from higher intelligence agencies end)


Quote are obviously glownigger AKA Cia agent. No doubt in it

 β„–18944

also a color inverted glowie looks like quote

 β„–18953

Not CIA but likely MI6 (basically UK cia)



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 β„–18951[Reply]

It was the 29th of Yampy, that's 5 days ago now at the time of writing this to the /y/emper board. I was doing my moderator duties when I suddenly saw a report ticket. "KELP MOLLUSK IS HUNGRY. FEED.", and it was reporting a post made by Happysnackingdog, a user who, as you all know, stopped posting about the same time as this ticket. It was reporting his last ever post on the Yorsetalk forums. I entered a snout-chat with the "Jonkeylompser" user, asking him what was up and what he meant- mollusks used to be a very serious topic when Rage Mollusk (not gonna say his real name) landed on all 12 continents of earth during his invasion and reign- but this guy was trying to feed a mollusk? A kelp mollusk? I opened up the snout-chat saying "Hey buddy, what's up with you and this report?" and all he replied with was the same thing. "KELP MOLLUSK IS HUNGRY. FEED."; it was at this point that I thought it was just a stupid troll, taking up moderator time. Maybe a troll from http://yumpler.org or something. I wish I was right. I wish this was all a bad dream but no it's a horrible reality. It was a bit of back and forth for 7 minutes when he finally said something different. "C:/users/PleemthaPC/horsebox/HRSE_HACK.DLL". I immediately did windows+e to open file explorer- and it was there. When I opened the folder it ran the dll file and immediately images of rotting horses started appearing- and red text filled my monitor saying "THE DAY OF THE MOLLUSK IS SOON" as pictures of basque women being raped and impregnated by slugs and a so-called "slug king" that was apparently all over spanish news last week… I'll never forget what I saw that day. This continued for 23 minutes, I was frantic and afraid that I would lose the only images of my retarded cousin Cute Lillyphant Snorkling in Beirut, who died of Bema Fever in 2011. It was then that my PC shut off. I heard knocking on my cat-sized window that I use to lure cats into my room so I can rape them and throw them out after… I didn't answer… Whatever was on the other side said "OPEN. KELP MOLLUSK JANNISARY HERE."… I should have listened… I'm so sorry you guys. The dude broke my window… Clawed at my kneecaps with a meat hook except the handle was of a carved snail-cat. I was crippled and horrified. He started to recite Mollusk history in Greece and Anatolia for 8 hours even after I passed out (I watched CCTVPost too long. Click here to view the full text.

 β„–18952

>>18951 (OP)
EDIT: I found the beagles who helped me. Skinned down to the bone on my driveway. A note beside them read "JONKEYLOMPSER, JANNISARY OF KELP MOLLUSK DID THIS TO THESE TRAITORS. YOU ALLOWED TO LIVE FOR NOW, BUT KELP MOLLUSK WILL RETURN FOR YOUR BASQUE SISTER.". I'm buying a gun tonight.



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 β„–18948[Reply]

Hello, teens. I am Nophono, the guy who cares fan about things. If you've seen any media related to Clamstaples, report it to me. I WILL deal with it…


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 β„–18850[Reply]

like 2 years ago i remember seeing some post online about sungazing so while on the bus ride home from school i stared at the sun in short 3-5 second burst multiple times. i dont know why. but i did.

when i woke up the next day my eyes burned and i ended up going to the eye doctor who prescribed me eye drops.

why do people shill sungazing if it literally just damages your eyes?

 β„–18860

File: IMG_1508.png πŸ“₯︎ (143.88 KB, 592x720) ImgOps

>like 2 years ago i remember seeing some post online about sungazing so while on the bus ride home from school i stared at the sun in short 3-5 second burst multiple times. i dont know why. but i did.
>
>when i woke up the next day my eyes burned and i ended up going to the eye doctor who prescribed me eye drops.
>
>why do people shill sungazing if it literally just damages your eyes?

 β„–18936

its fake
refer to sun worship

 β„–18938

ISHYGDDT.

 β„–18946

>>18850 (OP)
You're only supposed to do it at sunrise or sunset when the sun is visibly orange. It feels good.



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