№18082802[Quote]
Electrical socket
№18082804[Quote]
Ass
№18082805[Quote]
Ashtray
№18082812[Quote]
>>18082802>>18082805>>18082804kys that is a serious question
№18082820[Quote]
a pillow
№18082829[Quote]
>>18082820well yes i have been fucking my pillows but i want something tight
№18082837[Quote]
Toilet
Balloon
Sink
№18082839[Quote]
Peanut butter jar
№18082841[Quote]
Computer
№18082849[Quote]
Oven when turned on
№18082850[Quote]
man fuck you useless fucking niggers
№18082858[Quote]
>>18082837>>18082841>>18082849WHERE AM I EVEN MEANT TO STICK MY DICK IN THOSE THINGS?
№18082861[Quote]
Flash light
№18082865[Quote]
>>18082850Sleeping bag
Toaster
Banana (with only some of the flesh so it's tight)
№18082872[Quote]
i'm looking for something like a small fleshlight that i can squeeze in between my pillows while i'm wearing a VR headset
№18082879[Quote]
>>18082872Then buy a small fleshlight there like $20
Or use a peanut butter jar
№18082889[Quote]
>>18082872you can afford a vr headset but you can't afford a fleshlight?
№18082891[Quote]
>>18082879i can't i live with my parents
№18082895[Quote]
>>18082872>small fleshlightso a fleshlight?
№18082896[Quote]
Bbc
№18082901[Quote]
>>18082872Toilet paper roll (use lotion so it's not too rough)
№18082902[Quote]
Pencil sharpener
№18082906[Quote]
>>18082858a balloon is elastic and tight nigga
№18082911[Quote]
>>18082889it's a shitty rift S i bought off ebay for ~$100 and im not buying an actual fleshlight because my parents might find it
№18082917[Quote]
>>18082911Buy a safe to put it in
№18082924[Quote]
Mother
№18082926[Quote]
>>18082911just hide it nusoi
your parents (probably) aren't raiding your room like an FBI squad
№18082932[Quote]
>>18082917fair but when the deliveryman knocks on the door my dad is gonna be the one to open the door because hes always closest to it
№18082935[Quote]
sponge two gloves and a pringles can
№18082940[Quote]
>>18082932have a drone ship it to you or something
№18082944[Quote]
just do a JD Vance and hump your couch
№18082945[Quote]
>>18082926well yeah they aren't but i have no places to hide it in because my room is pretty bland
>>18082901i'm gonna try this actually
№18082946[Quote]
>>18082812I said ashtray.
№18082956[Quote]
>>18082944my dad hogs up the couch 24/7
№18082963[Quote]
Zelligtoilet
№18082969[Quote]
>>18082945put it under your bed or in a clothing drawer
№18082979[Quote]
>>18082975he sleeps on the couch too
№18082982[Quote]
>>18082956do you really haaaaaaave to fuck something other than your hands?
№18083002[Quote]
i just tried a toilet paper roll, it's way too small.
№18083007[Quote]
7>>18082983
What hollered
№18083009[Quote]
What happened ed
№18083012[Quote]
>>18083002do a banana peel, maybe with some of the flesh left in to make a hole
№18083015[Quote]
well, just cut your cock on camera
№18083016[Quote]
>>18083002Try peanut butter like I said earlier nigger
№18083018[Quote]
houseplants, the dirt feels surprisingly good
№18083019[Quote]
>>18082991finger your ass atp
№18083023[Quote]
>>18082991this is going to sound really bad but hear me out.
Poke a hole in your underwear and start airhumping
№18083024[Quote]
>>18083016i dont want to waste food and we don't even have peanut butter
№18083033[Quote]
>>18083023yo i am actually a genius hold on fuck OP for a second i need to try this out
№18083036[Quote]
>>18082963I replicated it, mid. 3.5/10 the mental pleasure of it far outweighed the physical one
№18083045[Quote]
>>18083024Then buy some, or you can use a cucumber or smth and use it anally, just make sure your ass is clean and you wash its skin afterwards with a sponge so it can still be eaten. I used to do this as a teenager
№18083046[Quote]
nevermind i am broke i dont want to poke a hole in my underwear
№18083052[Quote]
NUSOIS ARE CACAS AND CANT STOP GOONING? OHNONONONO
№18083054[Quote]
>>18082901I've tried that one, my cock is too large 1/10
№18083058[Quote]
>>18083019nigger i want to stop being this horny faggot that shoves things up my ass. just a few days ago i got so horny but had nothing to shove up my ass that i took a candle and tried to mold it into a dildo with a heat gun, i ended up not just melting but EVAPORATING the candle causing wax vapor to fill the room and trigger the
smoke alarm and i got SICK, like genuinely sick from it.
№18083065[Quote]
>>18083023that is retarded
№18083068[Quote]
>>18083054Paper towel rolls might work better if you have them
№18083082[Quote]
>>18083068we don't have them we just use toilet paper for that
№18083097[Quote]
>>18083068fair enough, out the two things I've tried toilet and toilet paper I gotta say both sucked. My cock was too big for the tp and the toilet seat wasn't pleasurable enough
№18083106[Quote]
i'm gonna check if we have sponges big enough for my dick hold on
№18083158[Quote]
i just checked the kitchen and nope i don't have any sponges, but it turns out that i do have a paper towel roll, but it's the same diameter as standard toilet paper rolls so that won't work either.
№18083183[Quote]
>>18083045cucumbers don't even feel good in your ass, it's cold and the surface is too rough
№18083213[Quote]
>>18083183Zucchini is probably better, and you can just microwave it
№18083232[Quote]
>>18083213what's the difference between these two?
№18083258[Quote]
Nigga wtf is this site going to
№18083267[Quote]
>>18083232zucchini is less bumpy
№18083272[Quote]
If you have money just do the Pringles can method:
1x Pringles can
2x sponge
1x paper towels
1x latex glove
1x lotion
Empty the can and clean it
Stuff the can with paper towels until your dick just barely touches them when you insert it in
Get the 2 sponges with both yellow sides facing each other and put the latex glove in between.
Put it in the can, lube up, and done. To clean, just get the glove itself, turn it inside out, and then clean it and let it dry.
<
Towel method:
Get a bath Towel, a latex glove, and lotion
Lay it out and fold it once (hotdog style)
Put the latex glove on one end where the part where you insert your hand in is slightly out
From the other side
If you want you can tie up the other end of the Towel
Lube up and done
№18083286[Quote]
>>18083272i don't have any pringles cans, nor any sponges but i'll try the towel method i'll report right back!
№18083303[Quote]
Ever try a venus fly trap? the feeling of the jaws enclosing on your shaft is simply immaculate, Only problem is that the dried cum usually kills the plant so I have to go to home depot pretty often to buy a new one
№18083332[Quote]
niggas ITT that like butt stuff are gross, doesnt it just feel like you're shitting out something?
№18083347[Quote]
>>18083332genuinely try it yourself. use a real dildo because they're designed for that and lots of lube. it feels surprisingly good.
№18083355[Quote]
>>18083332it hurts a lot its like shitting up a giant dump but when you get used to it it actually feel really good
№18083358[Quote]
>>18083347im scared of becoming gay so i wont do it.
№18083363[Quote]
ok, ive settled on which item imma fuck. I have a vape bomb in my house I was using when my irl militia was being assaulted by rich kid faggots, inside the vape is something that will likely result in death: benzzaine and 7 acet oxy, so I will remove that shit from this vape since thats an illegal possession and that would give cops probable and the probable cause could likely give enough grounds for the entire arrest of myself for it and give 20, I cant stand 15 year max of my lifes. With some lube, I should be able to shoved that bad boy right inside me since its really smooth looking and very slick vape, with an aluminum alloy of about 80 something percent with very smooth sides that likely has enough clearance around it and is made with high-quality materials and would take the insertion smoothly, so there won't or the likely is the lowest likely hood.
№18083364[Quote]
>>18083272wait hold on im confused, so i folded the towel, and now what? do i just put the latex glove in the middle and fold it? i feel like rolling it up would be better because it'll be more stable and tight
№18083365[Quote]
>>18083355oh my fucking god that sounds really fucking awful
№18083371[Quote]
>>18083363nigger kill yourself imposter
№18083372[Quote]
>>18083332no because it rubs against your prostate and it feels extremely stimulating, you dont have to be gay to enjoy the feeling of a foreign object rubbing against your prosate
№18083385[Quote]
>>18083372getting your prostate rubbed doesn't feel that good, hell i wouldn't even say it feels "good" at all, but it does make you cum which is the part that feels good. it's like you straggots never even got fucked in the ass before.
№18083405[Quote]
>>18083371how about you slit your throat you fucking faggot, you are a stuck-in faggot larping as me in my thread. You have never experienced the joys of sexual deviancy in regards of sexual relationships that includes inanimate items with any of your acquaintances you claim and they don't know you as some sexual psycho. A vape bomb is like a galaxy of experience that one such as you self wouldnt dare partake in if offered, nor that have any experience with any inaminate that has had experience or has tried any sexual acts other than your typical mundane faggotty experiences of your vanilla sexuality
№18083408[Quote]
>>18083364how are you even going to aim your dick when you have your headset on
№18083421[Quote]
>>18083368nah even if i dont like it the fact that i had something up my ass will have a serious effect on my mental and it'll actually turn me gay out of guilt
№18083424[Quote]
>>18083385Meh I actually enjoy the feeling but to each their own i guess
№18083427[Quote]
>>18083408using my other senses? it's really not hard.
№18083432[Quote]
>>18083405Anyways, a vape bomb is like my galaxy, its uncharted as its unique like many people say my thoughts are that I am truly alone there in this realm there is nothing. its the best high-quality device that Ive found for sexual gratification, if im to be 100% truthful with myself it truly is the thing that provides me the most amount of pleasure with its very own unique ways, no device is like as it touches every sensation within myself.
№18083441[Quote]
>>18083385i will never try sodomy kys
№18083444[Quote]
>>18083441nusoi what are you, STRAIGHT? KEEEEEEEKK
№18083448[Quote]
>>18083441ok fag that’s cute u thinking someone who hasnt dipped their toes in sodomy aka my personal and private business of being sexually deviant that it has given me unique sensations. Sodomy for myself is 95% positive of my deviating sexual gratification, what happens if one where too take that experience away and I get the 60 percent deviant experience, wouldn’t I like many other be completely left with absolutely nothing or any options.
№18083458[Quote]
JBG ass thread.
№18083475[Quote]
'gated
№18083476[Quote]
>>18083364ok i can't get the stupid towel method to work can someone please help me here?
№18083507[Quote]
>>18083476there used to be tutorial on it but cant find it
but you have to roll it not fold it
№18083531[Quote]
>>18083507i have been trying to roll it but it's really kind of unstable if you know what i mean
№18083536[Quote]
This entire thread is so bleak
№18083561[Quote]
Best of salt
№18083578[Quote]
>>18083531ok i kinda got it to work but it's still unfolding itself
№18083597[Quote]
>>18083588for 2 it just means fold it in half
№18083599[Quote]
>>18083597you also might want to do it twice
№18083610[Quote]
>>18083588>>18083597>fold it in halfwhy is that important?
>wrap end of glove over itthen i'll have too little depth left to fuck enjoyably
№18083621[Quote]
>>18083610idk the tutorial said so
№18083629[Quote]
>>18083610yeah you dont have to but its if you have a big glove
№18083634[Quote]
MUMMA!
№18083639[Quote]
well sadly i don't have any rubber bands but i'm planning on squeezing it between two pillows so it shouldn't be a problem
№18083656[Quote]
>>18083638Fold the towel lengthwise into quarters so you’re working with a long, thick strip. Place the disposable glove at one end of the towel, leaving the cuff sticking out slightly.
To make setup easier, you can slide a toothpaste tube or another phallic-shaped object inside the glove to help keep the channel open while you roll.
Pro tip: You can also lightly twist the glove before rolling to create subtle internal ridges that influence how it feels inside. A textured condom also works well here.
№18083670[Quote]
>>18083656>lengthwiseOH THAT MAKES SENSE
№18083726[Quote]
yeah now it turned out much better, should've fucking said earlier specifically to fold it along the lengthwise axis since i've been stupidly folding it along the latitudinal axis.
№18083735[Quote]
>>18083726thats why i said hotdog style
sorry im an amerimutt GEG i kinda fucked that up for you but its how i was taught as a kid.
№18083746[Quote]
>>18083691why would i try this when I have my eyes on the perfect, a beautiful aluminum device thats made extremely well and has very little to no friction. vape bombs also give the best anal stretching because you see they are a nice round thick piece of material.
№18083750[Quote]
also i think i can use bandages to bind it together so it doesn't unwrap itself, looks like the first aid kid from a taxi once will finally come in handy.
№18083757[Quote]
>>18083735that confused me too because i was thinking to myself "how else would you fold something?"
№18083763[Quote]
unironically an absolute gemerald of a thread, ive learned so much
№18083819[Quote]
well my gooninator is finished but now i'm no longer horny…
№18083864[Quote]
>>18083750oh my god i just noticed my ESL, i mean to say the first aid kit i stole from a taxi once*
№18083870[Quote]
>mean to say
MEANT
FUCKING KMS
№18083880[Quote]
Garbage disposal
№18083898[Quote]
im esl and trans if tht matters
№18083902[Quote]
>>18083891nigger what for
№18083916[Quote]
what's next? you're gonna put it on the 'ki?
№18083924[Quote]
personally i use vegetables. the best veggy for any type of sex is an avocado its got a soft skin and a big seed that makes it fun for any sexual play. the avocado is the easiest sexual object other than you’re bare hands, as it has a hole in the center perfect for a deep experience
there are many household items that we can use in foreplay i was with my boyfriend a little bit and a few of the ones that we used were the bathroom sink soap dispenser, chair and computer keyboard all which was fun
№18083931[Quote]
>>18083924cados are too small though
№18083937[Quote]
me :3
№18083978[Quote]
>>18083819GEG nigga put so much work into making a homemade fleshlight he no longer wanted to goon