/soy/ - Soyjaks

I sat at the campus gym for about half an hour, whittling down its prestige so I could take it over. Then, just as I did, some random red dude sniped it right out from under me.

So I healed up and cleared him out of there with a sound beating, but before I could get anyone into the gym, his buddy managed to stick a Pokemon in there. It took some careful timing, but I eventually managed to drop a random Flareon in (I have so many Flareon, guys. It’s a problem. I just want a Jolteon or Vaporeon. Either one would do. Just not another Flareon, please).

Naturally, the guy started fighting the Flareon to take it out, but this time I was ready. As soon as he wiped out the Flareon and the gym turned grey, I struck. I put another Flareon with the same nickname and nearly the same CP(combat power) in there.

Cue the “WTF is this piece-of-shit glitchy game doing?” reaction from the guy. “I beat it, why is that thing still there?” Meanwhile, I healed up my first Flareon, so when he tried again, I just put it back in the gym. After a few times, the timing got ridiculously easy: he beats Flareon, I put the other one in, heal while he’s fighting, rinse and repeat.

I was just going to let it go after a few repetitions, but then his buddy said, “Maybe it’s that girl over there doing it?” and he replied, “No, can’t be. Girls suck at Pokemon.”

Bitch, it is on.

I kept it up for another half hour until he ran out of healing items and had to stomp away, frustrated that he couldn’t seem to capture this “glitchy” gym.

You want to be a gym-sniping asshole? Fine, I’ve got better things to do. You want to be a sexist dudebro asshole? I will destroy you and everything you love.