/soy/ - Soyjaks

I think that I came to the conclusion that I can't find friends in this world, I have tried my best, but nobody can connect with me. I'm just too mentally ill for people to tolerate, and honestly I can't blame them for it. I am an annoying bitch and a lot of people left me because of it. I'm diagnosed with bpd and I just make little things into way bigger things then they actually are, I just make conflict out of things where everything is alright

Chasers love me on the other hand, I'm young and I can angle fraud very easily (I'm very ugly irl) so I always end up finding a chaser that gives me attention for a while. I'm not interested in a sexual relationship, but I can tell that I couldn't handle a romantic relationship with someone. Chasers who are only after my body will leave me in months because they get bored of me. I can't be interesting for anyone. I hate the feeling that I'm being only viewed as a sexual object but I barely have any other worth, and I like being liked.

I don't know how to make friends or how to be emotionally mature enough to maintain a friendship. When I finally find someone that understands me and won't leave me, I usually end up pushing away them, I want to see if they care enough to reach out to me again, but by that time I'm too in my head and push them away even further and things just stop working eventually.

Being a tranny isn't making things easier. I'm a shut in, I'm scared to leave the house because I don't want other people to see me, so meeting with people irl is just impossible for me.

I guess some people were just born to be alone
thank you for reading my lonely faggot blog
see you next time (maybe)