"Zdravstvuite, American! We Russians have received a message from the Kremlin to stealth blitzkrieg your soil with the help of our PLA tovarischa, and we are here to liberate your degenerate capitalist hellscape! Bow down to your communist saviors!
"What the hell? JANNIES THERE ARE TRANNIES LARPING AS COMMUNISTS RAIDING MY HOUSE! JANNIES, WHERE ARE YOU! GET THESE SH*MMYCUCK J*RTYCUCK XITTER GRAM CHINKTOK IMMIGRANTS OUT WAAAAAAA WAAAAAAAAAAAA I SHOULDVE JOINED THE MILITARY!""
Oh poor out-of-touch 'Nate', he's not aware 'Jannies' wouldn't be there to save him from Chinese communists and Russian invaders right in his backyard.
Had he joined the US military right in time before the inevitable WW3 hits the clock, he'd already gotten the military survival drills hammered down to instinct and he would've had the chance to protect his nation right instead of panicking.
Don't make the same mistake this 'Nate' made.
https://www.goarmy.com/how-to-join/steps