/soy/ - Soyjaks

hey /soy/, I'm starting to get very as you would say concerned about my mental state. Mainly because my life's actually really good and it's only improving but I can FEEL my grip slipping. I feel like any day, I'll have the psychotic and things will never be the same.
>chuddy calm down son what makes you think that?
just about everybody thinks there's something wrong with me. Most people I talk to are actively concerned for my well-being (more than I am). My relationship to my immediate family is strained because I can barely get motivation to do things or even finish basic tasks.
As for what my behavior is like, I'm quiet (not because I'm awkward it's because I just don't have anything to say) I actively avoid eye contact (eye contact is incredibly personal and I really only do it with girls I think are cute because I think there's a mental linking happening) when I do speak it's mostly disjointed, I'll forget words I was thinking 3 seconds ago. I speak about things that are tangentially related to what I was or they were talking about. Often I confuse people I talk to.
I'm convinced everyone has some sort of inate ability to slightly read minds, I don't have this ability, everyone knows this, no one wants to break the news to me.
I've began to be stressed about nothing literally nothing. I'd really rather be alone recently, it's getting worse. I'm starting to wear my clothes multiple days in a row, I caught myself trying to keep wearing underwear after a shower today (I swap chonies after showering). I've completely lost interest in playing games, I shut music off I usually enjoy listening to. I don't get nearly as much satisfaction from things I see other people being stoked about.
I haven't really heard voices other than sometimes when im alone usually around when I'm taking a nap. The biggest freak out I had was 2 years ago in high school and I locked myself in a bathroom because I thought the band kids were gonna attack me (those kids were silly I miss them)
Here's one people don't really associate with being a schizo but it's a real symptom: Sexual deviance. Thankfully I haven't had any opportunities to fufill these but I am a massive pervert. I'm a furry porn artist, (I see human features in animals and vise versa) I'd wouldn't be opposed to having sex with a man (I'd suck a dick, I've shoved shit up my ass and I ate my own cum once) The idea of being jerked off with a knife turns me on (I've done this). A lot of BDSM hoopla. Not to mention constant intrusive sexual thoughts (I've had to beat my legs to get them to STOP before) and it's 24/7

I'm just worried I won't be able to work anymore. What can I do to slow it down? Can I do anything to try to fix my behavior? I want to be able to feel normally so I can have healthy relationships with my family again.