/soy/ - Soyjaks

stupid bitch what does she know OP?

>>15678360 (OP)
>Mother found the empty booze bottles and sat me down for an intervention. "Nobody should be drinking this much"

>>15678360 (OP)
erectile dysfunction tiny white pecker cuckold award

LOL!

basically a troon award LOL!

My lady mother hath unearthed the hollow flagons of my secret vice, their spirits long since vanished, and hath compelled me to sit in solemn audience for a most grievous reckoning. With a countenance shadowed by sorrow and a heart heavy with maternal woe, she didst deliver this grave verdict: "Verily, no mortal creature, however troubled in soul, shouldst ever imbibe such a perilous deluge of intoxicating draughts, for such excess doth but drown the wit and court a most wretched ruin."

Tell her you were going to fill them up with water to make a flute arrangement with them, or that you simply have a fascination with empty alcohol bottles

>>15678412
Nay, sweet Mother, stay thy judgment and unbind thy heart from this heavy sorrow, for thou hast misread the map of my intent! I didst but assemble these hollow vessels with a most harmonious purpose: to fill them with varying measures of the crystal stream, that I might blow across their glass lips and conjure a consort of flutes to fill our dwelling with melody. If the music pleaseth thee not, then know 'tis but a curious fascination that guideth me; for I find a strange and wondrous beauty in the empty flask, admiring the way the sun’s golden eye pierces the clear void where the spirit once dwelt. I seek not the draught that dulleth the wit, but rather the vessel that holdeth the light and the song!

>>15678360 (OP)
how much were you even drinking for her to go "nobody should be drinking this much" o algo

Me wench mother found the rum flasks dry as bone and summoned me to her quarters to parley. "No scallawag should sip the grog by this measure."