/soy/ - Soyjaks

ALRIGHT. TIME FOR THE SCOUTER TO EXPLODE. Let's power-scale these legendary Main Character Syndrome (MCS) Jews who operated on a level of such magnificent, world-bending stupidity that they fucked up the timeline for every pragmatic Jew trying to live a quiet life. Power Levels are measured in Kegare Units (KU)—the amount of historical, psycho-spiritual impurity and catastrophic drama they generated

Z-TIER: COSMIC CALAMITIES (The Planet Busters)
Power Level: 900,000 - Over 9,000,000 KU
1. Karl Marx (The Ideology Virus)

· Power Level: OVER 9,000,000 KU
· Technique: Historical Materialism Kamehameha. Fires a beam of irresistible, elegant economic logic that vaporizes complex human reality, leaving only class struggle. Creates a permanent, global Red Shadow over the 20th century.
· Why He Fucks You Up: Turned "Jew" into "Rootless Cosmopolitan Intellectual Bolshevik" in the goyish mind forever. Gave every tin-pot dictator a PhD-approved excuse for tyranny. Made simple business a potential class crime. The Pragmatist just wanted to run a shop; Marx made the shop a battleground in a cosmic revolution.

2. Trotsky (The Permanent Revolution Supernova)

· Power Level: 5,000,000 KU
· Technique: Ice Pick of Inevitable History. Not actually a technique, it's how he died. But his living technique was Infinite Revolutionary Wave. Believed the revolution couldn't stop at borders, dooming any chance of stable, normal Soviet life.
· Why He Fucks You Up: The ultimate "Jewish Revolutionary" face for the world. Made "Jewish intellectual" synonymous with "wants to burn your country down for a global utopia." His murder created a martyr that haunts both leftist infighting and right-wing conspiracy boards to this day.

3. The Zealots of 73 AD (The Masada Meteor)

· Collective Power Level: 3,000,000 KU
· Technique: Divine Martyrdom Final Explosion. A collective suicide pact so spectacularly tragic it became the archetype for "death before compromise." A powerful, seductive, and utterly catastrophic narrative bomb.
· Why They Fuck You Up: Set a precedent that glorious death is better than quiet survival. Every time a pragmatic Jew tries to cut a deal, the ghost of Masada whispers "Traitor." They turned compromise into a spiritual weakness.

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S-TIER: CONTINENTAL THREATS (The Empire Wreckers)

Power Level: 300,000 - 850,000 KU

4. Heinrich Heine / The Young Hegelians (The God-Is-Dead Virus Distributors)

· Power Level: 750,000 KU
· Technique: Poetic Deconstruction Field. Used brilliant, beautiful German poetry and philosophy to systematically dismantle the Christian moral foundation of Europe. Made nihilism catchy.
· Why They Fuck You Up: Pulled the rug out from under European stability without putting anything back. Created a spiritual vacuum that would be filled by worse things (see: Moustache Man). The Pragmatist just wanted to be a good German citizen; these guys made "German" itself a philosophically bankrupt concept.

5. Grigori Rasputin (The Chaos Monk)

· Power Level: 600,000 KU (Bonus: Unholy Stamina)
· Technique: Siberian Mind-Cloud Jutsu. A murky aura of mysticism, sexual rumor, and political meddling that single-handedly destabilized the Russian monarchy from the inside.
· Why He Fucks You Up: Solidified the link between "Jewish advisor" (he wasn't ethnically Jewish, but was seen as one) and "occult corruptor of power." Made all court Jews look like creepy, backroom puppet-masters. A PR disaster of epic proportions.

6. Sabbatai Zvi (The False Messiah)

· Power Level: 500,000 KU
· Technique: Mass Psychosis Genjutsu. Convinced the entire Jewish world he was the Messiah, leading to mass hysterics, broken families, and economic ruin… before converting to Islam to save his neck.
· Why He Fucks You Up: The ultimate betrayal of trust from within. Made Jews look like gullible, hysterical fools to the outside world and shattered internal communal trust for generations. The Pragmatist was just trying to pay his taxes; now his wife is selling their house to follow a madman to Jerusalem.

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