/r9k/ - ROBOT9999

Beware of SNCA ahead.
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I fear I won't find anyone because I'm too different from everyone else, and may seem contrarian from those from the outside looking in. For example, I like folk and country/bluegrass music, and was thinking about getting a banjo, which where I'm from would make me a GIGA HITLER FASCIST WHITE SUPREMACIST TRUMP SUPPORTER or whatever the fuck. Everyone is either a whore, a broccoli normie, or a leftist shill, and only the seniors are fun to talk to.
I try not to think about it too much, as it's not my fault that I am the way I am, but my chances of finding a gf who will at least accept me for who I am seems impossible.
I fear that my anxieties and past experiences (EPI'd at 12, saw shit like 'p from schoolmates later) will make me not achieve any goals that I want in life, even if it's a small wishlist for now.
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Tell me, magickman, what can I do?
(Also how did you learn magick to begin with? I'm curious)

>>83015
Maybe there's a chance that something will happen, who knows. You only live once after all

>>83015
Aryan ubermensch

>>83014
You are alone. You had plenty of opportunities, but they've gone to waste somehow and now you can only envy the lives of others. Probably because they went unnoticed.
From what I see you'll remain alone like this, but you'll be more experienced and proud. I cannot see a future in which you have romantic success (sorry bro)
I'm told you need to master everything that sucks, and turn it into something enjoyable somehow.
So the alternative, if you decide to not let things take their course, wont really matter romantically. Once a stumpy willow, always a stumpy willow. The alternative is servitude, and being utterly subject to the whims of God.
I really dont like your fortune bro, it looks genuinely rough and theres no way for me to spin it into a positive, but it seems that if you continue as is you'll at least have a sense of pride and accomplishment

>>83018
Thank you.
Honestly I expected worse. I guess my negative outlook on myself and reality I'm in resulted in a worse subconscious expectation. I'll just do what I love I guess.
>I'm told you need to master everything that sucks, and turn it into something enjoyable somehow.
What do you mean by that exactly? "Everything that sucks" can mean a lot of things after all.
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Ignoring romantic aspects of my life, will I at least have a happy/happier future? I hope I'm not asking too much from you.

>>83023
Also my contrarianism comes both from my nature and slight autism. Can't help it. I have strayed too far from the flock.

>>83023
>What do you mean by that exactly? "Everything that sucks" can mean a lot of things after all.
I dont either, I close my eyes, see shit and reach for interpretation. Its a lot of reaching. You were out of water or something, because you had spilled it on the ground, then I saw a baseball bat turn into a communion cup thing and the first thing that came to mind was that the blood of christ, wine, filled the grail, and that you can beat the fuck out of people with a baseball bat, so I imagined it was like turning the misfortune (the torture and death of christ) into fortune (the salvation of man through christianity)… or something.
>Ignoring romantic aspects of my life, will I at least have a happy/happier future? I hope I'm not asking too much from you.
Not at all. I like doing it and I'm afraid its like the gym but havent gotten any reps in recently.
This is honestly kindof hard, since I dont really know what you like, but you're under-appreciating the present.
If you dont care about money, and just want to beat other people (at life ig) theres some way to do this but idk
I'll describe it, theres a stranger, like a out-of-town guy or something but not a bum with two scary pitbulls. He's living out of his car, which goes way faster than a car should, and he's broad, half-naked and jolked. His dogs are people. I think.

>>83027
>I dont either, I close my eyes, see shit and reach for interpretation. Its a lot of reaching. You were out of water or something, because you had spilled it on the ground, then I saw a baseball bat turn into a communion cup thing and the first thing that came to mind was that the blood of christ, wine, filled the grail, and that you can beat the fuck out of people with a baseball bat, so I imagined it was like turning the misfortune (the torture and death of christ) into fortune (the salvation of man through christianity)… or something.
OH SHIT. THAT DESCRIPTION IS THE GENUINELY THE MOST ACCURATE THING I HAVE HEARD SO FAR. I have both researched Christianity recently and sometimes have violent scenarios playing out in my head. I don't go after those impulses, but sometimes I feel like I should. I missed a lot of opportunities to beat someone who pissed me off, and I only ever did it once. The guy was an asshole btw don't worry.
>This is honestly kindof hard, since I dont really know what you like, but you're under-appreciating the present.
In short, I like traditional, sometimes ancient things. Not to the point that most chuddies on here do, but I recently took a liking to Irish folk and Americana music, for example. I like the feeling of wood and nature and stuff. I also like making things. I would describe myself as a creative person who sometimes draws and watches older people on youtube making cool things.
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And yes, you are correct on me under-appreciating. The last few months or so have been terribly boring because I spend all that time doing shit I don't like (I HATE GLOBOHOMO WEF PROPAGANDA). I haven't done thankfulness in a long while now, so I guess I should go back to it.
>If you dont care about money, and just want to beat other people (at life ig) theres some way to do this but idk
Reasonable I guess. I imagine it's about knowing more and using what you've learned to reach new goals in life. People change after all, and so do their goals.
>I'll describe it, theres a stranger, like a out-of-town guy or something but not a bum with two scary pitbulls. He's living out of his car, which goes way faster than a car should, and he's broad, half-naked and jolked. His dogs are people. I think.
Interesting description of who I can only assume is me. I like the hermit-like nature of me living in my car, though I'm not sure if I could keep pitbulls in such conditions. I don't have much experience with pitbulls, but I've met plenty of animals before.

>>83027
>>83029
dw none of the visions are literal unless its somebody dying, those are spot-on
>I'll describe it, theres a stranger, like a out-of-town guy or something but not a bum with two scary pitbulls. He's living out of his car, which goes way faster than a car should, and he's broad, half-naked and jolked. His dogs are people. I think.
I thought about it for a while and reached a decent conclusion.
Obviously the dogs are instinct as well as power, or vril or something, which the man has tamed. The car is similar to the dogs in that way but external to the man.
We could say (((they))) who have lots of power over others drive fast cars, generally speaking, and are not rooted to one place
ig its telling you to develop your vril, or that you're maybe not manly enough yet.

>>83030
i meant that they ARENT literal

>>83030
>ig its telling you to develop your vril, or that you're maybe not manly enough yet.
That may be true actually. I was never that manly in my life. I'm introverted, I almost never talk to anybody unless they're my friends and I often lack confidence in myself as a result of a harsh school environment. It used to be better when I was a kid. I'm slowly working to be more confident and to stop caring in life. So far it's going good I think. I am definitely much more open to debate topics with my parents for example.
Now how can I be more manly…? I never thought about that before, but I guess I should. I guess being assertive about my beliefs is a good start.

>>83032
I remember the dogs in the vision were wild, but the man was stone-faced
more specifically, it looked like this man knows that his emotions are separate from himself (as opposed to being controlled by them)

>>83034
>I remember the dogs in the vision were wild, but the man was stone-faced
>more specifically, it looked like this man knows that his emotions are separate from himself (as opposed to being controlled by them
Now this is VERY specific. I was very emotional and would have outbursts as a kid. I went to many therapies for it and at some point (I can't tell you when exactly, but I was slowly reaching adolescence) I became very calm and could control my emotions extremely well, better than some adults nowadays. Later on I went to meditation classes, and while it seemed useless, I learned how to control my breathing and calm down when I needed it.
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Taking it figuratively, it could mean that I'm either hiding what I really feel, or that I have achieved an almost monk-like state where I truly control my feelings, like the cube in vidrel. A calm, peaceful, state of mind.
That is definitely not what I feel right now, as I, like many others, am mixed in the stressful life of working for God-knows-how-long, going home, and doing nothing after that. I believe that this is either caused by my environment, or myself. Don't know which.

>>83036
>That is definitely not what I feel right now, as I, like many others, am mixed in the stressful life of working for God-knows-how-long, going home, and doing nothing after that. I believe that this is either caused by my environment, or myself. Don't know which.
I'm not a shrink, but most people supress only, the emotion and volatility is still part of them it just expresses itself in ways they dont recognize
they'll suddenly smoke way more when they're anxious or something, its never as clear-cut as people acting out, your laziness might be similar

>>83039
this is also why I dislike buddhism, the entire religion is a giant gaslight where adept are always put down by a 'master' who has reached enlightenment
this master than encourages the student to suppress more, which causes more cognitive dissonance and makes xim more receptive to the 'teachings'

>>83039
>I'm not a shrink, but most people supress only, the emotion and volatility is still part of them it just expresses itself in ways they dont recognize
>they'll suddenly smoke way more when they're anxious or something,
Never thought about that before. Obviously when you're stressed you don't exactly analyze your decisions, so it's hard to notice. It's one of those things that someone HAS to tell you about to make you truly see it.
>your laziness might be similar
I am not sure about that. I just don't have much to do or look up to in life. I've been trying to get myself a new hobby, like playing the banjo to do anything that isn't rotting on my ass watching whatever goyslop the algorithm suggests to me. I come back home tired, not mad. I can express my emotions very well.
>>83041
Isn't buddhism also about the massive gaslight known as karma, and if you do something bad it's going to come back and bite you in the ass? Sounds good in theory, but under scrutiny it doesn't hold itself that well. Even Christianity has a better concept of good and evil.

>>83043
>Isn't buddhism also about the massive gaslight known as karma
i think karma is a general pajeet thing, what got me into hating buddhism were reports of beatings and ritual sexual abuse
also, the KGB as well as Maoists based their indoctrination techniques on the buddhist teaching methods
<space for no reason
if you want to do this for yourself you can start by analyzing your dreams
this is the first time i've divinated for someone else (because it shouldnt be done too often)
interpreting the imagery is the hardest part, it might help to look at classical paintings first, and then research what they're about after interpreting them yourself
there are dream interpretation handbooks out there, as well as symbolism guides for paintings, but you should take those with a grain of salt
they work in a self-reinforcing way. if you read wassily kandinsky's 'spirituality and abstraction in the arts' itll prime that imagery in your mind and become a self-fulfilling prophesy in a way
the problem is that nowadays the most symbolic exposure people have is through fucking marvel, which limits the ways in which you can even formulate a dream, and even if you manage the range of expression is much shallower
diy'ing magick is usually more accurate. Just dont do it too often and keep a level head.

I am concerned about this dream I've been having, its usually in a white walled prison, where i am forced to dig through the floor into the soiled filth, causing the floor and its surroundings to be stained with muck, after I've dug enough, I lean through the hole like a controlled mannequin or some sort of test dummy, its always in third person too so I'm viewing myself leaning through. After that the dream ends, the hole usually has variations to it, sometimes it glows, sometimes its just a regular dirt hole and so on. I've been having this for the past few days, its always the fact that I have to dig right through the hallway thats bothered me the most.

>>83045
Thank you. That is a lot to take in.
My experience with maybe magical things is that I often see symbols that correlate with my life in some weird way. For example after a day at my school where I listened to Irish folk among other things, I ended the day early and took the train. One of the people leaving the train had a small Dublin airport bag. Stuff like that. I often analyze what I see and I can daydream about them. Sometimes it brings me feelings of great sadness upon the world, seeing how the purest, most innocent fictional characters are always written to either support or be a part of (((the cause))). It's autistic, I know, but it helps me find a place in the world and what I think somehow. I could bring examples of this, but it'll get very long.
Interpretation is easier if you do it all the time, is what I was trying to say.
>interpreting the imagery is the hardest part, it might help to look at classical paintings first, and then research what they're about after interpreting them yourself
Sounds interesting. I'll try it out.
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>the problem is that nowadays the most symbolic exposure people have is through fucking marvel, which limits the ways in which you can even formulate a dream, and even if you manage the range of expression is much shallower
Not just Marvel, a lot of media is just devoid of any spiritual meaning in general. The boomers who whined about "wrap music" only being about sex, whores and money were right all along. It's best to isolate from it, and only seek media that enriches you. You may occasionally watch something stupid, but it's best to KNOW that it's stupid and only provides you with cheap laughs. Balance (and awareness) is important.
Personally I don't think that formulating my emotions or dreams is something I'm bad at. Again, I do reflect a lot on what I watch and see, so this isn't that big of an issue.
>diy'ing magick is usually more accurate. Just dont do it too often and keep a level head.
Thank you. I'll try to do as you say, because from what you've shown me it provides great results when done correctly.
Goodbye, I have to go to bed now. Perhaps I'll come back tomorrow. Stay safe and practice magickal thinking.

>i can use magick or something
Tell me about something that is concerning you, and I will tell you what will happen, and how you might avoid your fate
>SNCA SNCA
>>OH SHIT. THAT DESCRIPTION IS THE GENUINELY THE MOST ACCURATE THING I HAVE HEARD SO FAR.
<fuck you and this bullshit, and thats what this is you know. satanic black magic! sick shit!

>>83047
reminds me of the count of monte christo a lot
theres a part when the dantes is imprisoned and tries to dig his way out and the prison hallway being obstructive is like 2-3 chapters of that book, and for the rest of the narrative he becomes consumed by vengeance
its not entirely similar, I think its warning you that even if you escape by digging that hole, you're still not entirely free
you can escape your environment but you're still controlled in some other way
the hallway might bother you because normally, if you had the keys, you could just use it to walk out, instead of digging in dirt
in the book, they give up on digging when dantes tutor dies, and he escapes by taking the place of his corpse (hallway)
white walls is unusually sanitary for a prison, especially contrasted with the dirt
in this way your captivity is more comfortable than trying to escape
next time you get this dream try taking the hallway, or floating into your own body.
>>83048
no problem
i think i should've been clearer about then just saying 'dont do it too often', more accurately would be 'dont do the same prediction multiple times' once you've divined your financial future, dont repeat it, but just write it down
dont rush for interpretations either, its fine if none of it makes sense initially, because it eventually will
this also means it should inform your decision making and not be the only determining factor for making a decision, you can get it wrong after all

>>83012 (OP)
will my financial plans pay off?

>>83063
Things are going well for you now, but in the long run no.
Your strategy for whatever investment needs to be made more clearly and decisively, no wishy-washy changing your mind shit or freaking out, even as things get turbulent. Become a sword.

>>83012 (OP)
Do I need to give you details of who I am and my life, or are you able to tell me my own issues and life circumstances through your magick?

>>83065
>Do I need to give you details of who I am and my life
If you dont want to you dont have to, the more specific the question is the better I can interpret what I see
>or are you able to tell me my own issues and life circumstances through your magick?
no, not at all

>>83066
How does the magick work?

>>83067
I meditate for a minute, write down the images that come to mind, and then I try to reach a conclusion based on the images and the question
Seeing a sword, for instance, can mean two very different things, if the question is something like 'will I be in a car accident' then that image would make it more likely so, but to the question 'am I making the right decision', it would lean the response towards yes
the orientation of the sword also matters, but theres not a coherent method to it

>>83068
But how are you capable of seeing imagery relevant to questions people ask, let alone that imagery supposedly being accurate to the individual’s unique circumstances? I’m really curious

>>83069
>But how are you capable of seeing imagery relevant to questions people ask
the imagery is not really related, i mean it depends a lot
in interpreting it I have to relate it back to the question
>that imagery supposedly being accurate to the individual’s unique circumstances?
again, the imagery doesnt really have to be related
its like stacking boxes, you can only stack them in so many ways because of gravity
say you see a specific shape made of boxes, but not really all of it
when you then ask me to make the same shape with the boxes I close my eyes and have supposedly unrelated shit flash before my eyes, and then I re-create that shape
because the number of shapes that can be made is limited, the odds are a lot better, and the vision, even if it seems totally irrelevant, it still influences how I put everything together, the magic part is becoming receptive to those images from wherever
or changing them and thus reality itself, though I cant do that

>>83064
thank you for the insights

>>83071
to put it this way:
you only see one perspective of the pile, then describe what you see to me and ask 'how does it look from the backside I cant see?'
I cant see what you do, obviously, but with the description and the vision I can (hopefully) reconstruct an accurate enough plan of the entire shape
but at no point do me and you have perfect knowledge of everything
or maybe I'm not that good yet, I doubt its possible