/soy/ - Soyjaks

So, first this is not a joke, I know this question may seem weird but let's just say I tried everything and this is like my "last? hope" or something.
Basically I (AMAB) have been struggling with gender dysphoria for a very long time, inexplicable pain when I'm being reduced to "a man" and other gender dysphoria stuff. It is pretty annoying, especially the fact that it happens everyday. I receive this pain at an average of 10 times a day I'd say.
I've asked for help before and people told me to transition (and also therapy but whatever). I don't especially want to be trans, I just want for the pain to stop and be able to live my life without such struggles.
I heard that people (terf for exemple) talking about trans identity as a "mental illness", so that is why I make this post, because if I was victim of some mental illness I probably wouldn't know.

Am really mentally ill ? If yes, is there a way to make the illness disappear or should still transition ?