/soy/ - Soyjaks

Doth thou see the destruction to come, oh dear Salt? Have thy actions registered in thy head, dear one?

Introduction
I have recieveth the dearest revelation of the future of the Heavens and the Searth. I know not if this proceedeth from divinity, but this vision remaineth peculiar. I haveth not been able to get it from my mind. It lingers deeply, and I must express the contents, my dear Adminophilus.

Recollection
I remember the receiving of the vision just as the yester flower blossoms. The circumstance of the vision was very undearing, and I hold shame for my actions. Nevertheless, I express the truth: I was gooning. The sickly act should have been avoided, but I confess only the truth. After i finisheth, and the toilet flusheth. and the sweat drippeth down my hand to the base of the chicken's head, a fragment of the future appeared in my thoughts. At first, i not believeth it, for such mind can not comprehend such a sureal experience. But, i felt a prescience to check the party, and so was done. I had checketh, and to my fear, the first seal had broketh. I shall explain deeper what the seals are farther, but they are the most important of the events to come, regarding you, oh dear Salt. With the attempted finding of your house, the trumpet has blared, and the 'teens have scourged, and their anger lies upon you. This should have never happened, and I feel deep sorrow for you, but thy actions have begun the first call of destruction, and I shall explaineth now, my Adminophilus.