>>18054519I'm not crazy but I do have a sort of mix of thought or actions. Some of them are morally good but in controversial ways that many would not agree are good. However most would. I'm also a bad person though and I act in bad impulses which grow stronger and worse over time. I can't speak on either kind with much detail.
Maybe it's some kind of cope but I feel deep inside me that the impulses and actions are driven from some kind of external force. I don't know what though and I can't imagine what the motive would be considering the contradiction in the types of actions. Like part of me thinks it's some elaborate glownigger shit but that strongly contradicts certain ideas or impulses or day to day plans and actions. But maybe it's something that could be more complicated than I understand or motives I don't know about which is what makes me paranoid all the fucking time.