/soy/ - Soyjaks

windowsCHADS stay winning

Windows 7 VVON

>salt uses fedora
OHNONONONONO…

WINDOWS 8.1 VVQN

Jared cheated on his wife. How could he? He was a thriving content creator, making mini-documentaries about video games, telling tons of people his trash takes. So why? Just why. I can't really come to terms with it myself. I'm assuming you're quite confused, so I'll tell you the backstory.
Jared was a grimy looking fellow, one who looked like a rat, and probably smelled like cheese. He started out making random video essays about subjects nobody cares about, especially stuff like, "TOP 10 CARTOONS FOR CHILDREN I WATCH AS A 30 YEAR OLD MAN - WATCHMOJO" and, "MY NAME IS ALICIA AND THESE ARE TYPES OF PHONK I LIKE." Such harrowing, riveting titles, for a man such as Jared.
The era he was making this in was the late 2000's, a period that was basically the wild west for people trying to produce content on the internet. Luckily for Jared, a video game publicity website noticed him, and allowed him to post his really bad videos on their website. Despite the fact he was the archetypal snarky critic who reviewed random gamecube games from 2002 that were probably called "SNARKY'S QUEST FOR THE GOLDEN PHONO," readers decided he was, in their words on forums of the time, "le heccin pro gamer," so they called him ProJared.
And, well… It stuck. Unfortunately so. To the point that it, in no uncertain terms, got to his head, resulting in him committing the actions discussed at the start. Starting sometime around the 2010's, he was cheating on his wife with a random cosplayer (Only weirdos do this BTW) which is really unwholesome, if that matters. The cosplayer's husband, RubberRoss, got really mad, and wrote something like this;
"I WANT MY HOUSE… OFF. THE. INTERNET! I WANT IT OFF NOW!"
His father calmly responded;
"ROSS… SHUT UP. YOU'RE RECORDING THAT INTERNET THINGY, AREN'T YOU?"
Ross retorted;
"YES. I. AM. WHAT ARE YOU GONNA DO ABOUT IT?"
They promptly killed each other in a double homicide.
So what, pray tell, does this have to do with anything? Well, some say it was luck, some say it was humanity, and some say it was a heart transplant, but regardless of anyone's thoughts, Jared's heart grew 3 times that day. Of course, this, no pun intended, change in heart, resulting in Jared to make an attempt at righting all of his wrongs. This started with Jared donating a million dollars to the "ROSS AND HIS DAD PHONK CHARITY." Jared was, of course, confused at the name, and said, "What's that? a kind of Verity?" but donated the money anyway, feeling bad about what happened.
Soon after, he donated more of his life savings to his wife, who was divorcing him literally as he was donating it, draining even more of his savings into a divorce lawyer. This rattled him to the bone, and took quite a toll mentally and physically, resulting in him turning into a rat and running into the sewers of New York, remembered as nothing short of a complicated case of humanity. (I.e. a kind of Verity)

Stop using Linux tranny kys

windows 11 vvon

>>17845503
Kys shitdows 11 faggot
Windows 8.1 won

>>17845546
windows 11 wonned because i use it and im too lazy to switch

up

My reaction to this information:

.

super bump!

all of them are faggots because their wearing a skirt doebeit

the only people I know who use nixos are esl aryans from eastern europe and that one xitter turkroach who runs goyimx.com

..

>>17846066
0 troons btw

>>17846066
i belong to the former btw

stop wordsalot

Thought it was a hanging tranny for a second geg

>>17846066
evendoe nixOS is an distro that only appeals to soulless codejockey cuckolds

>>17845397 (OP)
GentooDIETIES stay winning

>>17845397 (OP)
Windows is bearfoot btw

>>17846303
no one uses gentoo you stupid hitler cuckold

geg

mint users are aryans