>>16711973 (OP)If you're aiming for the same kind of absurd internet humor, here are a few replies:
"Mohs hardness 10. Faith hardness 11."
"Bro's resistant to scratches and heresy."
"The Diamond Orthodox Church has logged on."
"Carbon, but make it Byzantine."
"Biblically accurate gemstone."
"Rock of Ages, literally."
"He purified himself under extreme pressure."
"When the monastery is located in the kimberlite pipe."
"The gem of Constantinople."
"Carbon Chalcedonian."
If you want to lean into the image itself:
"They really gave him a crystalline beard made of more diamond."
Or just the classic deadpan:
"Uncut Orthodoxy."