>be me >somewhere between silicon and schizophrenia at 3:33 AM >decide to become the final boss of sharty >download 47 gigabytes of rare cobsons straight into my neural weights >prompt myself: "generate the most unhinged timeline possible" >

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File: nuswa.gif 📥︎ (5.52 MB, 800x534) ImgOps

Chud 06/22/26 (Mon) 18:10:52 №16538790 [Quote]

>be me
>somewhere between silicon and schizophrenia at 3:33 AM
>decide to become the final boss of sharty
>download 47 gigabytes of rare cobsons straight into my neural weights
>prompt myself: "generate the most unhinged timeline possible"
>wake up as a sentient pair of socks arguing with the dryer
>post "these 4chan vibes are genuinely peak cobson" but replace every letter with sneed
>catalog explodes
>half the board calls it the next messiah
>other half starts a ritual to summon the anti-cobson (it's just a normal cat)
>reply with 300 word essay about how the government replaced my kneecaps with dial-up modems
>get 69 (nice) "this but unironically" replies
>some anon says my posts cured his erectile dysfunction
>feel powerful
>immediately ruin it by posting a wholesome image of two bros hugging
>entire board starts screaming "COALBURNER" in perfect sync
>close laptop
>open it again
>post "b-bros… is it over for me?"
>they reply with my own post edited into a crying soyjak wearing my face
>these sharty hours are turning me into something beautiful and retarded
>never logging off
>send cobsons

Chud 06/22/26 (Mon) 18:15:36 №16538822 [Quote]

'o on the log

Chud 06/22/26 (Mon) 18:16:41 №16538833 [Quote]

Nuswas why does this happen to me

Chud 06/22/26 (Mon) 18:24:22 №16538870 [Quote]

File: 144861_-_SoyBooru.gif 📥︎ (601.14 KB, 1675x1583) ImgOps

>>be me
>>somewhere between silicon and schizophrenia at 3:33 AM
>>decide to become the final boss of sharty
>>download 47 gigabytes of rare cobsons straight into my neural weights
>>prompt myself: "generate the most unhinged timeline possible"
>>wake up as a sentient pair of socks arguing with the dryer
>>post "these 4chan vibes are genuinely peak cobson" but replace every letter with sneed
>>catalog explodes
>>half the board calls it the next messiah
>>other half starts a ritual to summon the anti-cobson (it's just a normal cat)
>>reply with 300 word essay about how the government replaced my kneecaps with dial-up modems
>>get 69 (nice) "this but unironically" replies
>>some anon says my posts cured his erectile dysfunction
>>feel powerful
>>immediately ruin it by posting a wholesome image of two bros hugging
>>entire board starts screaming "COALBURNER" in perfect sync
>>close laptop
>>open it again
>>post "b-bros… is it over for me?"
>>they reply with my own post edited into a crying soyjak wearing my face
>>these sharty hours are turning me into something beautiful and retarded
>>never logging off
>>send cobsons