/soy/ - Soyjaks

I've been with many people in the past 30 years. I used to love women. It wasn't that they "knew their place" back in the day, it was that the gender role of a woman was respected. They would respect that men filled specific roles and women filled specific roles in relationships. Men provided, women gave emotional support and care. Of course, as a man, you don't ignore the pain of your woman, but she would be your rock and your support system. There is a lot more than that, women understood the importance of giving sex and physical touch, making you feel like the most important person in the world, and encouraging your success through confidence. Nowadays, women want men to give all of this because they want to go out into the workforce and fill the exact same roles. Well, that leaves no one to fill those roles. But the expectations from back in the day still exist as well. But they don't want to hold up their end of the deal.

This led me to consider becoming gay. I am not attracted to masculinity at all. The thought of kissing even the most remotely masculine guy makes me sick. But the only person who could understand my pain and torment would be another man. I tried to find men to be with in some capacity. Being open about what I thought and who I was. I had sex with men, but it was difficult. It was easier to give oral sex because it was just sucking on a piece of flesh. Cum gave me a sore throat every time.