I feel like i've been losing my mind for the past year, but I don't know what to do about it. My memory, concentration and motivation have all degraded significantly since the start of the year, and i've become more reckless, irritable and apathetic especi

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Is it over for me? Chud 10/18/26 (Sun) 15:28:29 №103395 [Quote]

I feel like i've been losing my mind for the past year, but I don't know what to do about it. My memory, concentration and motivation have all degraded significantly since the start of the year, and i've become more reckless, irritable and apathetic especially within the last few months. My mind is plagued near constantly with intrusive thoughts and fears that did not exist, or at least were not nearly as bad a year ago as they are now. I've always been pretty apathetic and pessimistic, but now it feels like there's truly nothing to really look forward to. I've tried distracting myself, but it all feels inherently pointless when I have no greater goal or passion in life. I wouldn't consider myself actively suicidal, but I admittedly don't have a reason to live. I mean it really feels hopeless because this isn't like a thing where I want something but am unable to achieve it, right now what I want is to want something. I wish I could believe in something bigger than myself, like a religion or some ideology, but I just don't. I don't even have a greater dream like starting a family or some career I really want to pursue, nor do I think the shit I do distract myself with is a big enough reason to stay alive.

A couple weeks ago I got frustrated by how stagnant and directionless everything felt, and thought that by hurting myself it'd spark some sort of massive change or break from the monotony of repeating the same day over and over, that'd get my life back on track. It didn't change anything at all, and self harm is faggot behaviour anyways so I shouldn't have done it in the first place. The only thing it did do is convince me that I might need to seriously consider actually doing something about all of this before I end up impulsively killing myself or something. The issue is, any (((doctor))) or (((psychiatrist))) I tell about this is surely going to try and force me to take (((meds))) or institutionalise me or something. I also can't tell anyone in my personal life either because I've not told any of this to anyone, and as far as everyone's concerned i'm completely fine, so It'd be kinda selfish of me to lay this onto someone else, especially all at once. So yeah, I feel like i'm all out of options right now. Any ideas or insight would be appreciated.

Chud 10/18/26 (Sun) 16:21:09 №103403 [Quote]

Do you have friends you talk to regularly and actually like being around OP? If you don't life gets real miserable. Humans aren't meant to be alone for long, these feelings are the body trying to tell you that you need to go find "your" people.

I find that generally this sort of stuff comes from extreme monotony. I spent the last year or two of high school in a permanently drowsy, tired state, I couldn't bring myself to care about studying enough to properly lock in (I got mostly Bs for grades, but that was still scraping it for what I wanted). I had to cut off my closest friend because he manipulated a girl and hid it from everyone, and everyone else at school was really boring to be around (except one guy i didn't share lessons with).

I've graduated now and have started work. I haven't felt as happy in years. Its mostly just been boring training stuff but I'm a lot happier with where I am in life. The people here aren't as morally good, but are more interesting to be around. I've moved out and its rough being away from home but its still a change that I needed. Sometimes, you just need a full restart of scenery. If you are sick and tired of school, try to see if changing schools is a possibility, or start a random ass hobby. Something you wouldn't consider "you" doing. Change is good for the soul.

Chud 10/18/26 (Sun) 20:58:32 №103421 [Quote]

>>103395 (OP)
>thought that by hurting myself it'd spark some sort of massive change or break from the monotony of repeating the same day over and over,
the real solution is hurting others

are you an incel by any chance?

either way, just retardmax

Chud 10/18/26 (Sun) 23:01:21 №103432 [Quote]

Try holotropic breathwork / vipassana meditation. Give it at least 40-60 minutes and see if it works

Chud 10/18/26 (Sun) 23:21:53 №103434 [Quote]

>>103395 (OP)
have you tried tren therapy?

Chud 10/19/26 (Mon) 12:23:10 №103473 [Quote]

>>103403
I'd say I have a decent amount of friends that I actually like being around, and i'm generally on good terms with the people I know. Despite this however, I only really talk to a few of them on subjects deeper than just banter. It feels like in the last couple months i've come to realise how little I have in common with most of my friends, which is probably why I'm unable to start conversations on anything that isn't just built purely on jokes. That isn't entirely a bad thing, but it admittedly usually feels like I'm not really connecting with any of them past that. I hope I do end up finding a group of people to connect with, but I can't even begin to imagine who'd they be. Aside from that, it feels like my overall desire to socialise has noticeably fallen, and I no longer get excited to hangout or do things with my friends. It's super weird to me because the past few years, especially 2025, I became super extraverted and took every opportunity I could get to do anything. I don't really seek out social events anymore, but I do still get invited to them pretty frequently and i've decided to at least check each out when they happen, as to not just spend however long rotting in my house.
>>103421
You're glowing, but I agree retardmaxing is keyed.
>>103432
sounds sorta interesting. I guess there's really no harm in trying so I may as well give it a chance.
>>103434
I'm no soyentist, but I imagine blasting myself with tren or any other steroid may not necessarily improve my situation. Not that I wouldn't mind being shredded ofc, but unless i'm missing something, it doesn't really seem to help solve my problems, nor does it seem worth the potential cognitive side effects.

Chud 10/19/26 (Mon) 12:35:59 №103474 [Quote]

>>103395 (OP)
Just sleep more

Chud 10/19/26 (Mon) 14:45:26 №103496 [Quote]

>>103395 (OP)
>like a religion or some ideology,
well we dont want you either
>whos we?
doesnt matter. This applies to all beliefs and ideas. If you honestly believe in something, and you most likely do, if not realizing, than you already subscribe to a worldview and thus fit to some ideology.
I encounter this mostly with retarded tiktok and such 'eens, that feel the same way like you described, pick the first tuffest shit that their garbage algorithm picks, set the bar for others incredibly high without themselves actually commiting, but then piss their pants when asked to do so.