/q/ - Soyjak Party Meta

Hey Cobblestone, I've had a crush on you for a long time now it's mainly due to the fact that you're a Soybunny (new term I just coined for soyteen foids) and I have had a terrible relationship with my mother. My most joyous activity is imagining myself and you meeting one day in a beautiful Krakow park and holding hands while kissing each other on the cheek. Id imagine you caressing my hair and dressing me up. You probably won't know and will never know who wrote this, but keep in mind that I exist and I have a crush on you. I'm using this to take weight off my shoulders (I'm sisyphus), and I know that a parasocial relationship is horrid, yet I still love you and deeply care for you. My love for you has been escalating steadily, I'm ruminating about you daily and I cherish the fact that we may meet together one day (preferably you you driving up to me randomly and taking me somewhere you'd like). After that we could go to your place and drink some Hamas (it's ok if you don't clean up your place, I like it that way). If you just so happen to be taller than me then please I beg of you to dye your hair purple and achieve a slim figure. PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE BE MY GIRLFREIND!!!!