№5213[Quote]
💻 JOKER & GIGACHAD HACK THE REDDIT SERVERS: WAR OF THE UPVOTES 💻
Part II of the Saratov Cinematic Meme-Universe
Night. Reddit HQ.
Servers hum like a depressed choir of overworked interns. The moonlight reflects off the giant cooling tower shaped like a downvote arrow.
Inside, two silhouettes sneak through a ventilation shaft:
One is shredded enough to bend steel with his eyebrows.
The other laughs every time a camera detects motion.
Gigachad whispers, voice like a subwoofer on pre-workout:
— Stick to the plan. We steal the subreddit, we rewrite the rules. No cringe allowed.
Joker grins, holding a USB shaped like a rubber chicken:
— Oh, I’ll rewrite everything. Even their CSS. I’ll make it Comic Sans.
Soyjak (in a tiny earpiece from the outside):
— I'M KEEPING WATCH!! Also, someone just stole my bike!!
—
🔥 PHASE I: INFILTRATION
They drop into the main server hall.
Joker:
— So this is where all the karma goes to die…
Gigachad:
— Focus. Find the r/fitness admin terminal. I must restore my rightful flair: "Beard Level 100."
They approach the glowing console.
Joker inserts the rubber-chicken USB.
The entire wall of screens instantly fills with…
SOYJAKS. THOUSANDS. ALL SCREAMING.
Gigachad:
— What did you do?
Joker (laughing hysterically):
— Installed my operating system. Jok3rOS—every error message is a punchline!
A siren blares.
Reddit Security appears: a squad of mods wearing fedoras, armed with banhammers.
Head Mod:
— Stop right there! This is a violation of the Anti-Brigading Meme Accord of 2016!
Joker:
— Accord this!
He throws a handful of “Unfunny Content” reports like ninja stars.
Mods recoil instantly.
Their weakness.
—
💥 PHASE II: THE CHAD UPGRADE
Gigachad cracks his knuckles.
Gigachad:
— I will become… THE ALPHAMOD.
He grabs the server tower.
It sparks.
The lights flicker.
His muscles enlarge by +20 Reddit Gold per second.
The screens display:
> NEW ADMIN GRANTED: u/GigaChad1488
Permissions: Everything (even deleting r/pics)
Joker (awed):
— You just admin’d yourself into a deity.
Gigachad:
— And now I fix my flair.
He types:
> Flair: "Deadlifts More Than Your Entire Bloodline"
—
⚠️ PHASE III: JOKER’S BETRAYAL (OF COURSE)
Joker sneaks behind Gigachad with a keyboard:
Joker:
— And now I take control.
Who needs karma when you have chaos?
He slams Enter.
Suddenly, every subreddit banner becomes a rotating GIF of Joker dancing down stairs.
Reddit Security spirals into meltdown.
Soyjak (screaming over the radio):
— THEY PUT A BOUNTY ON YOUR HEADS!! 10,000 UPVOTES AND A REDDIT GOLD TROPHY!!
—
🚀 ESCAPE FROM REDDIT
As the mods surround them, Gigachad grabs Joker by the collar.
Gigachad:
— Emergency exit time.
He suplexes a server rack, breaking a hole in the wall.
They jump from the 20th floor onto a passing drone delivering Funko Pops.
Joker, wind in his face:
— You know, for a gymbro, you’re an excellent getaway driver.
Gigachad:
— And for a clown, you’re moderately tolerable.
The drone flies off into the night.
Below them, Reddit burns with Comic Sans.
—
🌐 TO BE CONTINUED…
Next chapter teaser:
🔥 “GIGACHAD VS. ELON MUSK: THE BATTLE FOR TWITTER HQ”
🚀 “THE RETURN OF SOYJAK: AGE OF FACEFILTERS”
💣 “JOKER CREATES A NEW SUBREDDIT: r/UnstableClownLore”